Secret Boyfriend is the sixth episode of Malcolm in the Middle's seventh season.
Plot[]
Malcolm gets paired up with a popular girl called Vicki for chemistry who turns out to be smart and really likes him. She doesn't want to lose her reputation of being popular, so she decides they have to hide their relationship.
Lois demands Reese get a job and when he doesn't, she takes things away from him and he is eventually forced to live outside the house. Meanwhile, Hal is determined to give Dewey his free game of mini-golf he feels he should have won, but Dewey couldn't care less.
Synopsis[]
Malcolm's in love with a hot and secretly brainy teen named Vicki who fears ruining her image by seeing him publicly. Jessica thinks he deserves better because she has seen the latter for who she is inside. She tries to warn Malcolm to end his relationship at once since she knows Vicki only is dating him in secret just so she can maintain her popular image.
At the house, Lois is frustrated with Reese after finding a flier in his backpack to sign up for career day, which was last Wednesday. She asks Hal what they can do about Reese since he’s 18 years old, doesn’t work or go to school and he’s still the same Reese who doesn’t care about his future which she now deems unacceptable. He tells Lois that he thought she had given up from her previous attempts to motivate Reese into caring about his future.
Dewey comes into the kitchen and tells Hal that he beat his high score in mini golf at the Putt-Putt Palace. Hal is initially proud, and then sees Dewey got a hole-in-one on the final hole so won a free game. Dewey however tells Hal that the ball got stuck in an obstacle so didn't earn the free game but doesn't care. Hal is angry at this, both at the owner of the golf course and at Dewey for not standing up for himself.
Malcolm refuses to listen to Jessica about Vicki due to the former's track record of tricking him in the past and getting him into trouble, so Jessica tells Malcolm she has feelings for him. Malcolm realizes how right Jessica was about Vicki being narcissistic in maintaining her popular image. Despite her attempts to want to continue their relationship, Malcolm breaks up with Vicki and telling her off that he deserves better.
After getting a nightmare about Reese in his 40s still living at home, still in high school, failing his test and refusing to get a job by pestering Hal and Lois in their old age, Lois wakes up and storms into the boys' bedroom and threatens Reese to get a job and to keep his hands off his father’s toupee.
Hal takes Dewey to the mini-golf course to try and get his son the free game, even though Dewey couldn't care less. The owner tells Hal that Dewey didn't ring a bell at the end of the course so didn't win anything. Hal gets so worked up he then throws something at the owner and attempts to blame it on Dewey.
The next day, Reese believed that was a nightmare of a witch with snakes for hair. He talks to Malcolm about it, believing that the witch wants him to get a job and move out. Malcolm asks him if she had bugged out eyes and tells him that the same witch has appeared in his dreams. Lois walks in the kitchen and asks Reese if he’s going to look for a job, giving him déjà vu from his dream, freaking him out. She starts demanding him to get a job as everyone else in the house has a job and are pulling their own weight. When Reese refuses to get a job by telling Lois off that he doesn't like taking orders from anyone and including her. She responds by telling him that not working isn’t an option and he is not getting any more free rides.
In a montage, Lois continues to make her stance clear by taking things away from Reese:
- When Reese enters the kitchen to get something to eat while everyone else is gone, he discovers that Lois has chained the refrigerator shut, leaving him unable to get any food.
- While Reese is in the middle of a shower, Lois comes in and shuts the water off, leaving him stunned.
- At night, Lois takes all of Reese's sheets, blankets and pillows off his bed, thus forcing him to try in vain to use newspaper to sleep comfortably.
- Finally, when Reese is on the toilet and needs to wipe, he finds that Lois has not only removed the toilet paper from the roll, but has also locked up the drawer to prevent Reese from getting any. This forces Reese to reluctantly tear a page from the comic book he was reading to use to wipe.
After about a week, Reese is filthy, smelly, hungry, and tired, but still refuses to get a job. He tries to ask Dewey and Hal for help; Dewey refuses but Hal sneaks a piece of toast to him. When Lois enters, she is offended by his looks and B.O. and tells him again to get a job, but Reese again refuses. This leads to an argument which ends with her, kicking him out of the house, forcing him to make home in a reinforced box.
In the middle of the night, Hal forces Dewey out of bed and breaks into the mini-golf course determined to get his son the free game one way of another. Dewey begs to go back home since he's tired, it's cold and its so dark they can barely see the course. Hal encourages his son to start standing up for himself, especially after Dewey hits the golf ball into a small house and it doesn't come out. When Hal goes in to retrieve it, Dewey decides to take Hal's advice and locks his father into the house and goes home. Hal is both angry at his son for leaving him there and proud that he's finally taking a stand. Only then does Hal realise that his roommates for the night are a family of raccoons.
After coming to Jessica's house, he explains that she had been right the whole time. Jessica then reveals she lied about being interested in Malcolm so he would get over himself and realize the truth about Vicki. At Malcolm's anger and disappointment Jessica kisses him, only so she can be certain she feels nothing for him. She tells him that she'll see him tomorrow and leaves.
However, Lois lets Reese move back in to take care of her when she pulls a muscle in her back in trying to destroy his box. He later has a nightmare about himself in his 30s and having to take care of an obese and elderly Lois 24/7, the climax being her revealing her stomach folds for her sponge bath. Horrified, Reese wakes up and busts inside Hal and Lois' room. He tells a terrified Lois know that he has decided to get a job, finish school and move out. And just in case he fails, she can clean out her own stomach folds.
Cast[]
- Jane Kaczmarek as Lois
- Bryan Cranston as Hal
- Christopher Masterson as Francis (credit only)
- Justin Berfield as Reese
- Erik Per Sullivan as Dewey
- Frankie Muniz as Malcolm
Guest Stars[]
Recurring[]
- Hayden Panettiere as Jessica
Cameos[]
- Sarah Wright as Vicki (credited as Sarah Mason)
- Harold Sylvester as Phelps
- Erik von Detten as Brad
- Larry Polson as Lloyd
- Perry D'Marco as teacher
Trivia[]
- When Vicki is pretending to be superficial and stupid in front of Malcolm, she says she had to take part in a discussion whether gloss or glitter is better. Malcolm whispers to her that he thought the issue was resolved with Fermat's Last Theorem, causing Vicki to laugh. Fermat's Last Theorem is a famous conjecture by a French mathematician in the 17th century that was only proven in 1995. This is one of the most famous theorems in mathematics.
- Erik Von Detten, star of Recess and Toy Story guest stars in this episode.
- The song playing in the background during Lois' dream sequence about her and Hal when they are old is a modified version of the Malcolm theme song.
- The song used during the montage when Lois starts taking away privileges from Reese is Shut Up! by Simple Plan.
- Malcolm and Reese's high school looks different than it did in seasons 4-6 (it's possible it's the same high school and building but different sections for lower- and upper-class men).
- Lois states that Reese is 18 years old in the episode. In the earlier episode Health Insurance Reese informs Hal that he’s 17 years old, implying that Reese had his 18th birthday in the short gap between the two episodes.
- The miniature golf course scenes were shot at the Sherman Oaks Castle Park.
- Reese's hobo friend, Lloyd, is the third character in the series with the name Lloyd after Lloyd Jensen and Chad's father Lloyd.
- The nightmare Lois had of Reese, at least in his 30's, still living at home and still haven't finished high school exemplifies how badly Lois fears Reese will never leave her and Hal alone.
- Final appearance of Jessica. She was supposed to make a return appearance in Stevie in the Hospital which she convinces Malcolm to see him despite his own fears of seeing his friend die and Graduation which she sits next to the Wilkerson boys and Stevie.
- The nightmare Reese had of himself in his 30s being a high school dropout and living at home exemplifies his own fears of having to take care of an elderly, obese, and controlling Lois 24/7.
- This episode showed that Hal has accepted that Reese will always be the same delinquent from his attempt in Reese Cooks and thus made secret arrangements with Mr. Hodges to have him work as a janitor in North High after graduation in Graduation.
Goofs/Error[]
- While Reese was using the toilet, he was unable to access toilet paper and he says "Sorry, Spiderman" and tears a page of his comic to use as toilet paper. However, he was not reading a Spiderman comic.
Quotes[]
- Vicki (to Malcolm): I think it's really romantic. It's like Romeo & Juliet. Our love has to be hidden.
- Malcolm: I'm not hiding it.
- Vicki: I wish you would.
- Lois (about Reese): What are we going to do about him, Hal? He shows absolutely no interest in his future.
- Hal: I'm sorry, honey. I thought you had given up on him too.
- [Reese is having a nightmare of himself in his 30s taking care of an elderly, obese and controlling Lois.]
- Lois: Reese! Reese, get in here quick! Do you hear me? What is the matter with you? Are you deaf? It's time for my sponge bath! You think these stomach folds will scrape themselves out.
- [She tosses her bed sheets and Reese screams in terror. He quickly runs inside Hal and Lois's bedroom to confront his mother]
- Reese: I'm gonna get a job! I'm gonna get a life away from here! And just in case I don't, you can clean out your own damn stomach folds.
- [Lois is having a nightmare about having Reese in his 30s as a high school dropout with no job and still living at home, tormenting her and Hal in their old age. She wakes up and immediately busts in through the boys bedroom as Reese awakens.]
- Lois: Reese, you may think you're pulling some kind of scam! But I'm on to you! You are getting a job starting tomorrow! And keep your dirty mitts off your father's toupee!